equivalent exchange

remember when last week (and the week before) i'm in two-yearly dilemma between staying in singapore or hopping to another country? it's about my employment pass renewal, which seems to be longer than employment pass new application (HR department mentioned she submitted the application at the same day, and mine just came out two days ago.)

and for the news:

it is approved. 

it's good considering how familiar am i in the current industry after two years, and i am grateful i'm able to secure a job here despite of tight quota of foreign workers. scoring big cash, to have a savings worth of 3 months indonesia fresh graduates gross salary on monthly basis, or to be able to bought my first own property when i was 20 (i heard few friends bought a property and share the cost with their parents, but i never heard any of them bought a property with their own cash, fully paid. i might be the first in my batch though.); those are things i am thankful for and only can be achieved if i work here, in singapore. 

on the other hand, i need to excuse myself away from home and parents once again. forget about the gap year, even a gap month would be a mere dream. who dares to take 10 days leave and come back to find mountain high of workloads? 

and thus, i remember a line from fullmetal alchemist:

sometimes, anime taught a good point.

are these the so called equal value that i need to gave up to earn the big cash?

time with money?

free days with workloads?

dreams with routines?

family warmth with individuality?

i feel there's more, but at this moment i don't know what.

since it's given, i believe it would be the best at this time frame. 

and whatever the outcome is, i am truly grateful. 

it would be some time til i set off for new york.